Is The Trend "Slow Fade" The New "Ghosting"?

There is nothing like the feeling of new relationship energy. You know the onev—vthe feeling when you’ve been dating someone for a while, it’s going really well, and you start getting giddy thinking about them. But then, as their texts pivot from flirty paragraphs to one-word replies, the blissful bubble bursts. That behavior, my friends, is called the "slow fade" in dating.

"The person doesn't disappear entirely; instead, their texts become shorter and less frequent, dates become rarer, and their enthusiasm noticeably wanes," says Natassia Miller, an ASSECT-certified sexologist and relationship expert with Dating News. "They're still technically 'there,’ but their presence feels increasingly hollow."

But what does the slow fade really mean? And what can you do if you’re the one being slowly faded out in a relationship? Or better yet, are you guilty of the deed yourself? With the help of experts, we're breaking down all the need-to-know deets on navigating this modern dating behavior.

According to Miller, the "slow fade" in dating is the gradual withdrawal of communication and effort in a dating relationship. It's when someone progressively becomes less available, responsive, and engaged over time until the connection eventually dies out.

You might notice that once frequent good morning texts turn into no text at all; they slowly pull their energy back even when actively going on dates with you; and, in general, you just feel that that something is off.

Now, you might be thinking, "Isn’t that just ghosting?" Well, no. It’s actually quite different.

While ghosting is like slamming a door shut, the slow fade is like slowly turning down the volume on a relationship until it becomes silent. "It's a drawn-out process that can take weeks or even months," says Miller. Unlike with ghosting, which is often quite abrupt.

"They [the slow fader] gradually reduce communication, attention, and effort until the relationship fizzles out completely," Foxx says, "It leaves the other person wondering what’s happening because the disconnection happens in small steps."

Because of the slow in the slow fade, it can often be more psychologically taxing than ghosting, due to the ambiguity and false hope it can create. With ghosting, the message is clear (albeit hurtful): it's over.

"Ghosting is abrupt, but at least it’s clear," Foxx adds, "With the slow fade, there’s always a lingering question: Are they busy, or are they done with me?"

In short, it doesn’t feel great.